She Got the Goldmine (I Got the Shaft) Lyrics

She Got the Goldmine (I Got the Shaft)
By Jerry Reed
The first few verses are spoken with drums as a rhythm so the chords
Really don??t change although you could get away with the E, A, B run,
same as the further verses. I just kept it in E.
Well, I guess it was back in '63 when eatin' my cookin' got the better of me
So I asked this little girl I was goin' with to be my wife
Well, she said she would, so I said, 'I do'
But I??d-a said, 'I wouldn't' if I'da just knew how sayin' 'I do' was gonna screw up all my life
Well, the first few years weren't all that bad, I'll never forget the good times we had
'Cause I'm reminded every month when I send her the child support
Well, it wasn't too long til the lust all died and I'll admit I wasn't too surprised
The day I come home and found my suitcase sittin' out on the porch
Well, I tried to get in, she changed the lock
Then I found this note taped on the mailbox that said
'Goodbye, turkey
My attorney will be in touch'
So I decided right then and there
I was gonna do what's right
Give 'er her fair share
But, brother, I didn't know her share was gonna be that much
Chorus:
She got the goldmine (She got the goldmine), I got the shaft (I got the shaft)
They split it right down the middle and then they give her the better half
Well, it all sounds sorta funny but it hurts too much to laugh
She got the goldmine, I got the shaft
Now listen up, you ain't heard nothin' yet why, they give 'er the color televison set
Then they give 'er the house, the kids and both of the cars
See Well, then they started talkin' about child support, alimony
And the costs to the court Didn't take me long to figure out how far in the toilet I was
I'm tellin' ya, they have made a mistake 'cause it adds up to more than this cowboy makes
Besides, everythin' I ever had worth takin' they've already took
While she's livin' like a queen on alimony, I'm workin' two shifts, eatin' baloney
Askin' myself, 'Why didn't you just learn how to cook?'
Spoken:
Heh, heh
Hey, you ain??t kiddin?? I got the shaft
But I don't have to worry about totin' a billfold anymore
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha
I let my wife tote it, I'm gonna be carryin' food stamps
You get it, judge I'm gonna be indebted
That's my money, Huh...Contempt of court
What do you mean I'm in contempt of court